The Scorekeeper

...day by day and days gone by!

BLESS YOU!

One thing Philip learned (and retained) early is manners. Children like Philip who may be deficient in some areas are often proficient in others. His strength has always been his ability to grasp, retain and 'never let go'. You show or teach him something, and if his mental abilities are sufficient to grasp the concept, the logic, the reason...he's golden...he owns it...he's good to go! We were very fortunate in the area of manners.

Society, in general, often takes a 'stand-offish' attitude towards those with handicaps or disabilities...be they mental or physical. So it only stands to reason that a 'rude' special needs person doesn't have a chance!

Not so in Philip's case. At the age of 30, he's very well-mannered (at least we think he is...to tell us otherwise would just be rude!).

As a young boy Philip was taken with the expression 'Bless You'. Someone would sneeze, at least in our house, and it was immediately accompanied with 'bless you'. Well he not only learned it, but like a sizzling fastball across the plate...he nailed it...took it 'out of the park'! Doesn't matter these days...family, friends...perfect strangers...you sneeze...you get the famous 'Philipial' blessing!

In fact, after he sneezes, if we're not quick with the 'bless you', we hear a chastising..."dad?"...for some reason he can't move on until he's been blessed. One time, as a youngster, we heard him sneeze in the next room...silence...he was waiting...nothing. Finally a very annoyed, definitive..."bless me!"...and he resumed his activities. He wasn't taking any chances..."You won't bless me...I'll just bless myself!"(makes sense...kinda). To this day you will not escape his sneezes. If one forgets...one will quickly be reminded. Mr. Manners will have it no other way!

Thanks to a determined mother, Philip is incredibly polite. Yes (not ya), please, and thank you are predominant in his daily vocabulary. He could never leave to go to someone's house, whether 5 minutes away or overnight, without Diane asking him, "Are you taking your manners with?" To which he was quick to reply,"Yes mom, I've got them right here"(pointing to his head).

"Would you like a sandwich, Philip?"..."Yes please". "Here's your allowance"..."Thanks". "Come and help me shovel the driveway"..."No thank you". "Philip, I could really use your help"..."But I said, 'no thank you'!" (somehow, in his mind, simply saying 'no thank you' qualified him for being lazy. I must try that next time I'm asked to vacuum).

They say there are 2 certainties in life...death and taxes. At our house there's a third. While we encourage Philip's independent spirit and make every effort to loosen and lengthen the leash...every now and then we need to take a stand...we need to say no! Well, whoever coined the phrase 'hell hath no fury like a woman scorned', hadn't met our son!

Monsoonal madness rages and tornadoes soon collide,

He leaves us gasping as the hornets swarm.

Volcanic venom fills the air..'head for the hills' and hide,

'Cause Philip just unleashed 'the perfect storm'!

But as sure as night follows day, and spring follows winter...Philip's apology is just seconds away. He stomps to his room, mumbling and grumbling as he goes, and closes the door with a defiant slam. And we start to count. We seldom reach 20...and the door opens...and a calm and contrite Philip emerges...sits next to his mom...and with head held low and his heart in tow, he says..."Sorry mom...sorry dad...I know you're right...I shouldn't have acted up...I just couldn't help myself!" (that part we understand...and so does he...and the fact he's so willing to apologize for a behaviour he really has little control over is a wonderful testament to this young man's keen insights into what is right and wrong, good and bad, worthy and wishful. He has taught us much in the area of relational behavoiur).

Some think love means never having to say you're sorry. We beg to differ...it means the world to us!

Philip loves cake. Chocolate cake!( well who doesn't?). My mother used to make the best chocolate cake ever...from scratch! Today Diane makes the best chocolate cake...from Sara Lee! And we don't care...hey...it's cake!

Yesterday was Pastor Paul's birthday. He and his lovely wife Linda live right next door (they sneeze...and...well...you know what happens). He ministers at the Kitimat First Baptist Church, which is also right next door. When Philip found out about the birthday...he went into action. Not that it was that important that he wish the pastor 'happy birthday'...he just knew there had to be cake! He was determined to go there at 5:30 which would have interrupted their dinner and we knew they had guests (old people like to surround themselves with 'their own kind' at times like this!). So we very prudently used up one of our allotted Nos. The result? Refer to previous poem. Bottom line? Apology accepted...we know the routine!

They came over at 9:30...with left-over appetizers...pizza...AND CHOCOLATE CAKE! A very large piece of chocolate cake! I suggested we save some for when Johnny arrives. Philip looked at me like I had 2 heads. "No thank you!", he politely, yet emphatically stated. "He's on his own!". He then proceeded to devour every last morsel and crumb. Thanks a lot Paul...he was wired 'til 6 a.m. this morning...never slept a wink...bad dreams...the whole nine yards! (we'll get you back...we're bringing him to church this Sunday...after a hearty breakfast of CHOCOLATE CAKE!).